Follow Me

    Jesus went up to some fishermen and told them to leave their nets and follow Him. They did, and their lives were never the same. We've heard the account many times. But did you ever stop and think what that would be like today? These men left their jobs, their businesses, their steady supply of income. If Jesus came up to you today and said I want you to quit your job and follow me, Could you? Would you?   

   Often when we think of following Jesus we think of being a missionary in another country, or doing voluntary service somewhere. We gladly answer the call to "follow Jesus." We pray, "Of course Lord, I will follow You to the ends of the earth."  We sing... 

"I will follow wherever You lead me,

Wherever You are underneath these stars is where I want to be

I will lay down this old life of mine

I'll leave behind all the things of the world just to follow You

I'll be strong and courageous

I'll live my life for You my only King

'Cause You're my God through all the ages

Here am I,

I am Yours,

Send me"

       But what if that's not what God has in mind for us? What if God leads us to the mechanic where an oversize bill is waiting for us? What if God leads us into tough relationships? What if God takes us into unemployment or a serious illness? What if God allows us to go through the unexpected death of a loved one? What if like Job, God takes everything we have away from us? Would we follow Him then? Suddenly the following Him part looks a whole less glamorous then it did at first. Are we still committed? In the moment when life looks dark and the future looks uncertain... when there are no answers, and it seems like God is doing everything wrong... will we follow Him then?

Can we, like Habakkuk, say...

Though the bank account does not prosper and there is no steady income, 

though I'm sick and my health is fading away, 

though the path ahead of me looks impossible and scary, 

YET I WILL REJOICE IN THE LORD;

I will exult in the victories God of my salvation! 

The Lord God is my Strength, 

my personal bravery, 

my invincible army; 

He makes my feet like hinds feet (I can dance)

He will make me to walk, (not stand still in terror, but to walk) 

and make spiritual progress upon high places.

*Just  some  thoughts  I  had  after  teaching  the  Junior  Youth  Sunday  school  class  today,  and  hearing  a  wonderful  message  on  gratefulness. 

Strength to Climb

The future may look uncertain to you

You cannot see what's coming to view
You're all alone and so insecure

can't trust the unknown it looks so unsure

But do NOT give up, don't run and hide

My presence will ALWAYS be right by your side

I've watched your heart break, I've seen all your pain

It's hurting me too, but there's beauty to gain

Hold tight to my hand, it's reaching for you

When it's dark and it's cold, I'll carry you through

Rest in my strength and trust in my heart

Let me lead the way and you won't fall apart
                                -A.J. Miller

The future looked scary. I saw Mt Everest ahead of me, looming so high I couldn't see the top. I knew I had to climb it... but oh help! There is no way! EVER! And then God said, "you don't have to climb it today, you just have to take a few steps today, can you do that?" "But God," I cried, "Why did you choose me? Why do I have to have these experiences? Why this mountain?" And God said, "Because I knew you could do, and because I want to make something beautiful out of you. It's only through the hard times that you become stronger. I will be walking with you, and when you fall, I will pick you up. Just like mountain climbing, when you climb you can't be looking at the top, you have to be watching where you put your feet. Your focus needs to be in the moment, while your goal is to reach the top. I have already been through your future, and I'm never going to leave you. I will give you enough strength for you to keep going. Take one day at a time, and savor the moments. You only have one chance to live today, so make the most of it. There will be dark times, and painful time. But you can trust me, I will not let you go. Hold tight to My hand and I will lead you all the way to the top." 

Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do.

But to hold it together when everyone else in the world 

would understand if you fell apart,

that's true strength. -Lao Tzu

I like how Louie Giglio explains Isaiah 40:27-31... such powerful words. Be blessed! 

"When you are at the toughest place in your life, how do you know that God is going to hold you together and bring you through?...  Here's what Isaiah says, "So why do you say oh Jacob, and why do you complain oh Israel my way is hidden from the Lord or my cause is hidden from my God." What the people of Israel really wanted to know was, does God see what I'm going through? Does He see what I'm carrying? Does He know that I can't take one more step or one more day? Does He care, and can He do something? 

Isaiah answers with another question. "Do you not know, have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary and His understanding no one can fathom." He's huge. He is a star breather. He's big. This big God, "He gives strength to the weary. He increases the power to the weak. Even the youths will grow tired and weary and young men will stumble and fall. But those who hope in the Lord. Those who wait in the Lord...." The Hebrew word for hope and wait means those who stand right in the midst of the craziness, right in the midst of the pain, right in the midst of the chaos and standing in the middle of it they say you know what, I don't see what God is doing. I don't understand what the plan is. But I will tell you one thing, I am not going to give up on God. I'm gonna stand right here in the middle of this moment and I'm gonna trust that God is sitting on a thrown and that He has a plan and a purpose for my life and I believe that I'm gonna see the goodness of God in the land of the living. I am not gonna stop believing that, no matter what. That's what it means to hope and wait on the Lord.  

And Isaiah says, here's the promise... You're gonna wake up to rosy circumstances. No. Oh He can do that and He does do that. BUT THE PROMISE IS GREATER THAN THAT!!! Those who wait upon the Lord, here's what I promise. I will renew your strength. And when you think you can't take one more breath, I'll give you enough to keep going on, and to keep going on, and to keep going on, and to keep going, and to keep going... You keep hoping and I'll keep causing strength to rise when you hope. And you will feel like you have been swept up on the wings of eagles and you will run, and not get weary. You will walk through it all and not faint. I will hold unto you, even when you let go of me, I'm not gonna let go of you!

"Lord, that is my response to You. I will hope in You. I will keep taking one day at a time, and rely on Your strength to guide me through life. I will trust You to lead me up any mountain that you see is for my good and the good of those around me. I trust You, and I will walk with You, where ever You lead, for Your glory."

"...In the presence of a Holy God,

 I bow down, and I adore. 

You reveal the secrets of my heart. 

And I'm shaken to the core. 

In the presence of a Holy God, 

there's new meaning now to Grace. 

You took all my sins upon yourself. 

I can only stand amazed. 

And I cry Holy, Holy, Holy God. 

How awesome is Your name.

I cry Holy, Holy, Holy God. 

How majestic is Your name. 

And I am changed, 

in the presence of a Holy God."

Mrs. B

We have a neighbor lady that is always sitting outside on her door step. She's an older lady, and is always smiling and waving to people. This is the lady that lives at the place we first thought were drug dealers. (long story) Well a few weeks ago she started waving to me. I didn't know her. Never met her, but still she waved. ALL THE TIME! If I go out to our deck she waves. When I walk from the house to the car, she waves. When I turn out the driveway and go down the street she waves. When I return, the steps are repeated. I counted in one outing it is possible for her to wave 6 times. :) Some people might find this creepy. Maybe she's a stalker? But I decided I needed to meet this lady. So yesterday I made some lemon poppy seed muffins. Now let me interject here...I choose them because I had those ingredients on hand. Ralph says poppy is maybe not the best thing to take to someone you think might be doing drugs. :) This morning after being up for a while I noticed she was sitting outside. I felt the Holy Spirit prompt me. "Go, now. Go meet her. This is your chance." So grabbing a plate of muffins out I went. As soon as I opened the door she waved. I waved back, smiled, and started across the street. She saw me coming her way and immediately put a cushion on the chair beside her. I approached her saying... "I see you smiling and waving all the time, and decided I needed to come meet you." She got up and without even saying hi, or my name is... she gave me a big Grandmotherly hug. Then she said, "May I make you a cup of coffee?" Of course. "Wait here, I'll be right back." This is so ironic, I thought. I don't even know her name yet. When she came back I told her my name. She said her name was Batilidalihadgill... or something like that. But I could call her Mrs B or just B. (Ralph wondered if there was one L on the end or 2. I said it sounded like 3) She is 79 and has 11 kids and lots of grandchildren and great grandchildren. I told her I was looking for work and had a job interview that afternoon and she said she would pray for me that I would get the job. I told her it's so nice to see her always smiling and waving. She must have a lot of friends. She said she gets lonely sitting at home by herself all the time. Her husband died 8 years ago. But the people that used to live where we live now, the man would wave back, but the lady never did. She would always just look away. I made the comment something about living with my brother, and she gasped and said, "I'm so sorry!! I thought he was your husband! I am so sorry." I just laughed and said yeah we've heard that before. It's ok. We chatted on, and about 5 min later shaking her head she said, "I am so sorry, I thought he was your husband." I just laughed again... I finally had to excuse myself to go check the laundry. She gave me another hug and told me to stop by anytime. I think I found another friend, and when I looked back after crossing the street, she smiled and waved. :)

Mrs. B. really blessed me. She has obviously had a lot of pain in her life. She said she is the only sibling left in her family of 19. She could be sitting in her house all day watching soap operas and other tv junk. She could be this old, cynical, grouchy lady that no one wants to be around. But by all outward signs she is totally the opposite. I look forward to getting to know her better. 

The moral of the story is... be friendly, smile, and wave to people. Even if you don't know them. Not only will you make a difference in peoples lives, but you will also grow to be a cheerful old person whom people will be glad to go visit. So go out and smile and wave a while. 

He takes my breath away

We all have those moments in our lives when life looks bleak and God seems silent. In those moments we cry out to God... "Are you still there? Do you care? Do you see? What's the point in all this? 


And then there are those moments when God takes our breath away. Something happens at the right time, and we know that God is watching out for us. We know that God sees, He knows, and most importantly, He cares. 


Not too long ago I was very discouraged about some stuff.  I was driving home late in the evening and crying out to God about the stress in my life. I was doubting His goodness, and the direction He was taking me. About 8 min from home I decided to turn on the radio. Less then a minute later my favorite song came on. 

When you're awake and you can't believe your eyes,
Cause all the truth that you knew has turned to lies. 
When you're scared and you can't see past a day,
Remember who holds tomorrow, 
Know His love will light your way. 

Hold on when everything is shaking 
Stand strong when the ground is falling through;
Reach out to my hand in the darkness 
That's holding you. I'll be your peace in the waiting, 
Your strength when you're broken on the floor. 
Hold on, it's all worth fighting for! 
Cause I will never let you go.

-Manafest

Isn't that beautiful?! It's a song that God has used before to speak to me. A song that leaves me feeling that God is indeed holding my hand. I first sat there with mouth hanging wide open, not daring to believe what I was hearing. Tears were instantly rolling down my cheeks. It was like God was right there in my car, speaking the words to me. God knows exactly what song is my favorite, and I believe He delights in blowing my socks off and reminding me how much He loves me. Who else but God could have nudged me to turn on the radio, or arrange for that song to play right then?? It was truly an amazing moment!! One that I'll remember for a long time. He. will. NEVER. let. me. go!


God knows us very intimately. He knows us better than we know ourselves.  He knows what makes our heart sing, and what brings joy to our lives. For some people maybe it's a shooting star, the color green, a child's laugh, a blooming flower, or a rainbow. For others it might be a beating partridge, finding a penny, a mourning dove, the smell of cut grass, the smell of rain, a loon's call... you name it. We each have things in our lives that take our breath away. 
GOD  DELIGHTS  IN TAKING  OUR   BREATH  AWAY!    He knows what those things are, and He just loves to lavish them upon us. 

Eric Ludy said it best...  

"Every song you love, every memory you cherish, 

every moment that has moved you to holy tears 

has been given to you from the One who has been pursing you 

from your first breath in order to win your heart. 

God's version of flowers and chocolates and candlelight dinners, 

comes in the form of sunsets and falling stars; 

moonlight on lakes and cricket symphonies; 

warm winds, swaying trees, lush gardens and fierce devotion."

Has God taken your breath away lately? 

I am so blessed!

The last few days I have been very sick. Laying in bed for 2 days definitely gave me time to think. Even tho I was holding my stomach in pain I was reminded that I could have it much worse, like so many others, I could have cancer. I am so blessed. When I returned to school my students asked me if I was better. "Yes, I am," I said. But I thought... "Of course why wouldn't I get better. That's what happens when a person gets sick they get better." But my student says, "God answered our prayers!!! We had special prayer for you." She thought... "It's a miracle!! God healed her!" Wow, how could I not praise God for my healing! OF COURSE it was GOD!!! How can I take healing for granted? Some people don't get better.... I am so blessed.

I have some amazing friends that have really reached out to me the last few weeks. While I was sick one particular friend drove 20 min out of her way to bring me some much desired sprite and crackers.... a little thing maybe. But it meant the world!! I am so blessed. Friends at school (co's) are great for hashing out the world's problems. Many hours could be spent after school just plain talking, and listening to each other's hearts... :) (love them) I am so blessed. 

My family is amazing!!!!! Us sibs have so much fun when we get together! I hear stories of broken families, and it makes me sad. I love my family very much, and can't imagine what it would be like to not get along. I am so blessed. Not to mention living with my brother!!!  He's one of my best friends! I definitely would not be where I am today if it would not be for him. I am so blessed. 

                                          

A few weeks ago I told the girl's club girls the story of Daniel in the lions den. Some of them had never heard it before. After the story one girl says... "I don't believe that story is true. How can a puny little angle keep some lions' mouth shut?" In the next few moments I tried to describe the power of God to the young girl. How does one even begin to describe it? I was reminded of how often I take knowledge for granted. I've grown up hearing these stories, and believing, not only that the stories are true, but in God and all His many attributes. I am so blessed. 

God has been showing me over and over again lately that He is taking care of me. There is a phrase that I keep hearing in songs, verses, or caring thoughts from friends, and that is, God is holding me. Such a simple concept but it brings much security. The storms may come, the winds may blow, but my anchor is Jesus, and  He is the solid rock that no man can destroy. God is with me in the midst of the storms, standing beside me, holding me close. It wasn't until the 3 men in the fiery furnace were actually in the fire, that they saw God's presence. 

 "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you, and through the rivers, they will not overwhelm you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned..." 

(from Isaiah 43) 

" Do not be afraid I am with you; I have called you each by name. Come and follow Me, I will bring you home. I love you, and you are Mine." (David Haas from Isaiah 43) 

God is so good to me! I am so SO BLESSED. 

 

2011 IN REVIEW

2011 IN REVIEW

*Cooking at SMBI

*Standing at Grandma's bedside as she entered Heaven

*Connecting with Miller cousins

*High heals, 6 girls, night out at Olive Garden

*New York City missions trip

*Visit to Waterloo Ontario in February 

*Blowing bubbles in a parking lot with Lizzie and Annie

*Many many wonderful moments with friends at SMBI

*Heading out on my own to start a new life in Ontario. God's very real presence, sleeping in a Walmart parking lot. Driving through lots of snow and rain 

*Job searching

*HARD decision about teaching school 

*Beach, sunshine, flowers, blue skies, walks along rivers 

*Bakery at Tim Horton's

*Bible in 88 days. God's very real presence, peace, and joy

*Trips to PA

*God providing with many pieces of free furniture

*Moving to another apartment. Setting up house

*Camping with various friends at various beaches

*Weeks of carpel tunnel and INTENSE pain!

*Visit from Twila, Graham, Dri, and surprise... ANNIE!!!

*MI reunion 

*Many lists of daily blessings

*11 AMAZING third graders who make me smile

*PA reconnecting with sibling weekend

*Strangers and friends who drove 2 hours out of their way pick us up when are car quit 

*Struggling with dividing

*Heart's cry for hurting, homeless, abused, rejected, children 

*Practicing and singing at a wedding... It takes 5 

*Christmas lights, decorations, programs, songs 

*45 hours on the road.. 12 days. Food, Family, Friends, Funness 

*Good times at home in MN!

*New Years Eve: After traveling for most of the day, and suffering from sore throat, I went to bed at 11:00

The last 12 months have seen a lot of changes. But God has been so good, and so real!!  I KNOW I am where He wants me to be. That is such a secure, reassuring feeling, and no man is gonna take that from me. I have had many MANY specific answers to prayer in the last year. God has guided, and lead, and tested, and loved. Yes I have made mistakes, and yes there have been many times where I didn't trust Him completely, and started taking things into my own hands. But through it all God hasn't given up on me. His faithfulness and love make me want to worship, love, and serve Him even more in 2012. I don't know what the next year holds, but I know God will continue to faithfully lead me. I am in His hands.